I aeries of angry replies from me to my incarcerated spouse in the moments following the brutal sexual assault on me.
Where was the love he promised on our wedding day? Where was the respect or (Honor) He vowed to show until death. Where was the protection or the cherishing he vowed before God and our families would be mine ?
Submitted:Mar 5, 2015Reads:126Comments:0Likes:0
~~I sent three letters to Mike expressing my pain and emotional disappointment in him. How dare he sit there in the security of the County Jail and tell me what he would do and what he would not do . First of all until Mike is being forced to perform sexual acts against his will he cannot say what he would or would not do. We all think we would fight until the moment comes.
He can sit on his high horse and lie to himself, I know , if the roles were reversed he would have had as many women in our house as possible . He has brought women in our home and into our bedroom with me there so, I have no reason to expect better from him ; if I were out of the home.
Who does Michael think he's talking to . There is no respect in our marriage , There is no trust either . The truth is there is love and therefore there is no marriage . Even if the state sends his sorry ass to prison for being a felon in possession of a firearm when he returns his ass if mine.
Where is the friendship ,where is the fondness, the tenderness, the affection, the adoration, the love he promised on our wedding day. He can be assured when he is released Michael will pay for every shameful, mortifying, undignified, demeaning, humiliating name he called me . His ass will literally pay for every unbecoming, untrue word he said.
Where is the respect he vowed before God, and my family he would honor me where is this reverence he is suppose to show me . I have not seen any respect, any admiration , or reverence from this man since the day we met I've played second to whatever whore, or Mistress was in his life . I promise he will pay for his disrespect in blood, sweat and tears. I won't divorce him and I won't kill him . I promise him for the rest of his miserable life he will suffer for disrespecting me .
He promised to treasure me , he promised he would appreciate me. What part of his jail house performance demonstrated his appreciation of me . He certainly showed how much he treasured me, I am a whore, a slut , I am an immoral twit who cheats on her husband . I do not think the minister had any of this in mind when he asked Michael to recite his vows . I cannot make Michael love me, honor me , or cherish me as he promised but, I can and will punish him for lying under oath . I can and will punish him for every untrue hurtful name he called me ,
Michael vowed to protect me where was he while I was being assaulted in our home . He was in jail. Why was he in jail because he was stupid enough to be seen, and photographed with the gun. His responsibility was to be here safeguarding our home. His responsibility was to be here looking after me , keeping me from harm , shielding me, guarding me, defending me . Because Michael was not here to do handle his responsibility it was possible for K. Malex to rape me
I vowed to myself. I would take Mike's invitation and exit his life forever. I had to make the promise to myself because everyone else thinks I stay because I love him. Love has so little to do with my and Mike's relationship. I stay because he needs me . Especially now, if I abandon him , If I leave there is no one in Mike's corner. Mike does not deserve to go through this trial alone . If I leave after the trial , he is homeless. I leave him to survive the only way he knows how as a criminal.
I agree if he will not be a man; and be there for me when I needed him , I should end the marriage .I gave him one week to man up . If he will not I have no choice but to take my money and exit his life.
It hurts that he would call me a permissive twit who cheats on her husband. If there was so little trust on his part neither one of us belonged in the marriage .
I challenged him if you truly believe I cheated on you . Get your ass back home and do your duty . Be a man and husband to me.
I can take it if the entire county chooses to call me an adulteress whore . The county can label me a prostitute . They do not know me from Eve .So, if they misjudge me, the pain is well within my tolerance level.
If accusing me of encouraging the assault because I did not physically resist him makes them feel superior . I can give them their superiority . I care what they think of me but, I care a lot more about what the man I married thinks of me .
I care to much for Michael and his opinion of me.
I sat at my desk looking out across the road at the county jail. I look at every cell facing the open window of my apartment and I curse Michael .
I've said all the things I've wanted to say and didn't since I first met Michael. I've cried and cursed him until there are no more swear words left . I've cursed the day his mother gave birth to him and I've cursed his mother for giving birth to someone like him .
A county or police vehicle enters the electronic gates I stop and question; is my attacker in that vehicle ? Have they caught him ? Will they be able to find him ? will they be able to arrest him ? I question is there enough evidence to obtain a conviction.
I want justice . I want both Kevin and my day in court . And realistically I know the chances of prosecution are slim , The chances of a conviction is even smaller. I can only hope the Deputy District Attorney is not afraid of loosing .
Where was the love he promised on our wedding day? Where was the respect or (Honor) He vowed to show until death. Where was the protection or the cherishing he vowed before God and our families would be mine ?
Submitted:Mar 5, 2015Reads:126Comments:0Likes:0
~~I sent three letters to Mike expressing my pain and emotional disappointment in him. How dare he sit there in the security of the County Jail and tell me what he would do and what he would not do . First of all until Mike is being forced to perform sexual acts against his will he cannot say what he would or would not do. We all think we would fight until the moment comes.
He can sit on his high horse and lie to himself, I know , if the roles were reversed he would have had as many women in our house as possible . He has brought women in our home and into our bedroom with me there so, I have no reason to expect better from him ; if I were out of the home.
Who does Michael think he's talking to . There is no respect in our marriage , There is no trust either . The truth is there is love and therefore there is no marriage . Even if the state sends his sorry ass to prison for being a felon in possession of a firearm when he returns his ass if mine.
Where is the friendship ,where is the fondness, the tenderness, the affection, the adoration, the love he promised on our wedding day. He can be assured when he is released Michael will pay for every shameful, mortifying, undignified, demeaning, humiliating name he called me . His ass will literally pay for every unbecoming, untrue word he said.
Where is the respect he vowed before God, and my family he would honor me where is this reverence he is suppose to show me . I have not seen any respect, any admiration , or reverence from this man since the day we met I've played second to whatever whore, or Mistress was in his life . I promise he will pay for his disrespect in blood, sweat and tears. I won't divorce him and I won't kill him . I promise him for the rest of his miserable life he will suffer for disrespecting me .
He promised to treasure me , he promised he would appreciate me. What part of his jail house performance demonstrated his appreciation of me . He certainly showed how much he treasured me, I am a whore, a slut , I am an immoral twit who cheats on her husband . I do not think the minister had any of this in mind when he asked Michael to recite his vows . I cannot make Michael love me, honor me , or cherish me as he promised but, I can and will punish him for lying under oath . I can and will punish him for every untrue hurtful name he called me ,
Michael vowed to protect me where was he while I was being assaulted in our home . He was in jail. Why was he in jail because he was stupid enough to be seen, and photographed with the gun. His responsibility was to be here safeguarding our home. His responsibility was to be here looking after me , keeping me from harm , shielding me, guarding me, defending me . Because Michael was not here to do handle his responsibility it was possible for K. Malex to rape me
I vowed to myself. I would take Mike's invitation and exit his life forever. I had to make the promise to myself because everyone else thinks I stay because I love him. Love has so little to do with my and Mike's relationship. I stay because he needs me . Especially now, if I abandon him , If I leave there is no one in Mike's corner. Mike does not deserve to go through this trial alone . If I leave after the trial , he is homeless. I leave him to survive the only way he knows how as a criminal.
I agree if he will not be a man; and be there for me when I needed him , I should end the marriage .I gave him one week to man up . If he will not I have no choice but to take my money and exit his life.
It hurts that he would call me a permissive twit who cheats on her husband. If there was so little trust on his part neither one of us belonged in the marriage .
I challenged him if you truly believe I cheated on you . Get your ass back home and do your duty . Be a man and husband to me.
I can take it if the entire county chooses to call me an adulteress whore . The county can label me a prostitute . They do not know me from Eve .So, if they misjudge me, the pain is well within my tolerance level.
If accusing me of encouraging the assault because I did not physically resist him makes them feel superior . I can give them their superiority . I care what they think of me but, I care a lot more about what the man I married thinks of me .
I care to much for Michael and his opinion of me.
I sat at my desk looking out across the road at the county jail. I look at every cell facing the open window of my apartment and I curse Michael .
I've said all the things I've wanted to say and didn't since I first met Michael. I've cried and cursed him until there are no more swear words left . I've cursed the day his mother gave birth to him and I've cursed his mother for giving birth to someone like him .
A county or police vehicle enters the electronic gates I stop and question; is my attacker in that vehicle ? Have they caught him ? Will they be able to find him ? will they be able to arrest him ? I question is there enough evidence to obtain a conviction.
I want justice . I want both Kevin and my day in court . And realistically I know the chances of prosecution are slim , The chances of a conviction is even smaller. I can only hope the Deputy District Attorney is not afraid of loosing .